Football Predictions*

I taunted Dirk, the footballer named after a porn star, and he responded. I asked serious questions about his character and he responded in the only way he knew how by scoring when it mattered most - against the Mancs.

In 2012 the manky ones with dubious financial credentials - in one way or another - have been sacrificed from Europe and their cups will not overflow.

I also got my commentary on #TransferDeadlineDay spot on as these tweets show:

*this week I have decided not to talk about Fulham away results. However, to any Fulham fan feeling aggrieved at loosing to the toffee's, it did not take a genius to work out that we have still to break the blue Curse up north. It's part of why Smiffy and I boo John Terry when given any opportunity. That is a blue curse - even if it was a different city. Anyway all away grounds look the same to me - depressing. 

United take Team Bonding too Far

I could argue that my reverse psychology worked and this was why Arsenal lost, although I'd be wrong. There is a great sense of togetherness at Manchester United who were clearly giving ahead by the 82minute as this picture shows:

Such is the togetherness at United that Aaron Ramsey had to join in.
Note not one other Arsenal player was involved*

Heads up to Kevin_Doyle29 for this comedy gem of a pic.

*Although I could speculate a lack of team bonding is why Arsenal have underperformed of late, we all know since Fulham's Ginger Nut knocked the stuffing out of them they haven't been the same. 

Ginger Nut in Arsenal's Face

Fulham were quite gentlemanly and placed a tea bag in the Arsenal. I applaud the Ginger Nut that did it.

Arsenal Bob what's the score?

• Fulham come from behind BBC
• Arsenal looked to cling on. Guardian
• This was a tale of two Achilles heels: Bobby Zamora’s and Arsenal’s Telegraph
• Fulham fight back to beat Arsenal Yahoo News
• 

Fulhamish Legends#1 - Clint Dempsey

USA and Fulham favourite
Deserving of the Love Bestowed

Clint Dempsey scores 

Fulham 1 - Liverpool 0

Nearly scores a brace

Swansea 2 - Fulham 0

Fulham fans prefer playing the big teams. 

We may get a bloody nose every so often. 

Fulham 1 - Tottenham 3

But not always 

Fulham 2 - Man City 2

Arsenal 1 - Fulham 1

Rivalries are worth the long wait  

Fulham 6 - QPR 0

This is a very, very Fulhamish Season.

Roll on Chelski at the Cottage. 

COYWS!

NEXT UP: Football Stories: The Spirit of Clint Dempsey

COMING SOON: I'm a Celebrity Chairman - Get Me Out of Here*

*Due to General Strike action this article has been delayed. 

The Dirty Secrets of the Arsenal Dressing Room*

"[the] large head often suggests a larger animal than the muskox truly is"

Sometimes you can be minding your own business and an idea hits you, or a Twitter Trend. Then when you investigate further you realise you were on to something, but wished you'd never thought of it in the first place as the truth is so depraved. We have all heard what goes on in the testosterone charged changing rooms up and down the land but I don't even think the press thought it was this bad: 

Dominant bulls sometimes treat subordinate bulls like cows. A dominant bull will casually kick a subordinate with its foreleg something they do to cows during mating. Dominant bulls will also mock copulate subordinates and sniff their genitals. [Wikipedia]

It's no wonder there's so much competition for first team places at Arsenal. Still if Arsenal keep winning who is to question Wenger's techniques?

* I am trying to wind up Bob