Monday, 12 March 2012

Statistically Mark Hughes is a Bellend**

No bias was used in the making of this table

Thirty-six points in twenty-eight games is not bad as we are safe, in the top half of the table - all built upon the foundations of fortress Craven Cottage. Two pillars that have held this up are shown by looking in the very unfamiliar territory of the top scorers charts - a land unknown to us at this point in the season. Yet looming large are AJ on 11 goals and Clint on a massive 18. Pog on 5 isn't doing bad either. The total of 34 goals our forwards have shared what the Whites normally manage in an entire season. All three have the distinction of scoring hat-tricks, which is something unheard of at Fulham unless we are playing a pub team and even then. These three in three enabled Fulham to win three games on trot. From these figures I can conclude Bryan Ruiz is obviously not pulling his weight and must surely be due a hat-trick by now the lazy bastard. 

In the form table for the last seven games, Fulham lie sixth, whilst QPR under #MarkHugesisaBellEnd are last, picking up just two points. Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Mark Hughes had ambition to reach the top
Apparently this happens every time he looks in the mirror
*  it was a fine trend on twitter that even QPR fans have picked up on 
it even spawned a parody account
More polite than my take on Loftus Road , but I'm not an employee
** this week I have decided not to talk about Fulham away results. However, to any Fulham fan feeling aggrieved at loosing to the toffee's the seals, it did not take a genius to work out that we have still to break the blue Curse up north. It's part of why 'spit on the villa' when given the opportunity. That is a blue curse - even if it was a different city and the blue is washed out and covered in claret. Anyway all away grounds look the same to me - depressing. 

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